Puja Bali

When I was 13 years old I was at a very awkward stage in my life.  I was trying leave my past behind and create a whole new me.  Being 13, I thought if I started listening to a different kind of music I would change into whoever it was that I wanted to be.  My friend gave me 2 CD’s his older brother no longer needed.  (What’s the Story) Morning Glory? and Be Here Now was what I got and they were both by Oasis.  Be Here Now was amazing but Morning Glory was my number one.   You may be wondering what any of this has to do with Global Perspectives and all that jazz so I’ll tell you.  It may sound so dramatic but I listened to Morning Glory religiously, it was my go to CD for any problem I ever faced and I even listened to it on my iPod the night before my Global Perspectives interview.  I lost Morning Glory the same day I lost my brother, both in the same car accident, but obviously one loss was much greater than the other.  I felt more lost than I had ever been in my life because I had lost the 2 things that inspired me to be more than who I was and fine the CD I could live without but the other loss was so much bigger than anything I could handle.  The first step I took to healing was trying out for global and now that I look back that was the best thing that I could have ever done for myself.  Global did for me what Morning Glory and my brother did for me, inspire me to be better and that was the kind of feeling that I thought I had lost forever.  I can pin point the exact moment I made peace with myself, it was during the closing ceremonies in Mongolia.  I bet it sounds so cliché when I tell you all that going to a third world country and building a school changed my life but it’s true on so many more levels than I could ever begin to explain.  My Mongols, you are all beautiful people how can I describe the bond we all share?  I can’t because it’s indescribable and so special, I am tearing up when I write this because I am going to miss you all so much.  The teachers, thank you, thank you, THANK YOU; I hope one day all the teachers of the world are as caring, amazing, big hearted, and funny like you all because then the possibilities for so many students like me would be endless.  Sean and Troy, You are both amazing people I can only hope I grow up to be as boss as you guys.  The dental team, I think it’s extraordinary that you guys do what you do and you have all helped me overcome my fear of dentists.  Geoff, yeah you still owe me watermelon gum but thanks for that talk in Ulaan Baatar(if you remember), it was cool and I’ll miss your humor.   Now to you Fijians:  Even when you feel one step closer to happiness or insanity, when you think your paranoid, when you make memories and sing foreign songs like ene bol fusion, when you say what you need to say, when you’re living life in technicolor, when you’re figuring out the heart of life, when you’re taking life at breakneck speed, or when you’re trying to find your champagne supernova in the sky; don’t ever forget.  Don’t forget why your here, don’t forget to savour every moment. Forget all the what if’s and just live, live for your family, your friends, the ones you lost, but most of all live for yourself.  That is the best advice I could ever give you.

And now I’ll be archived and I accept it, I’ve had my experience, left my legacy and now it’s someone else’s turn

Farewell and good luck !

Forever yours,

Puja “Puha” Bali….Colt to Mongolia 2010….Mongol <3

Somethings you’ll never forget.

I woke up this morning thinking “sweet no school!” I would be even happier if I was in my bed typing this on my laptop instead of being at the library and being glared at by the lady sitting across from me. Yes classes may be over but exams are still in full force. I have no idea when us Mongolians are supposed to stop blogging so I don’t know when to do a farewell blog :S. So the last 3 days of school seemed to stretch on forever and were filled with too much stress. From getting the Mongolian board done to finishing up last minute History stuff its been interesting. Signing yearbooks yesterday was hectic and bittersweet. I’ve had a lot of people tell me you don’t stay friends with the people you were buddies with in high school and that might be true but it doesn’t make it any easier to hear. A week ago I was so stoked at the prospect of starting post secondary,being out of school, and starting a completely new school now I feel a bit overwhelmed.  The only thing to take the edge of stress off this week was the parent dinner for global!  Being there when the plaque went up was such an amazing moment and it was even better having my parents there.  Later my parents and I looked at the plaque for Peru which has my sisters name on it and back at mine.  I had this weird feeling that everything had come full circle for some reason.  Anyway I should get back to the books, so I guess the next blog entry might be my last? :S
-Pujaaa
ps: I stay true to my word about songs repping my life, breakneck speed is 1 of my fave songs by Tokyo Police Club =D

Taking a little breather from studying…okay a big one ( I intend on re-watching Zoolander for the fifth million time after blogging ). I feel like everythings going by so fast yet in slow motion. Graduation, giving our letters to the Fijians, school ending this Wensday, finals, prom coming up..I’m feeling kinda overwhelmed and anxious. Although I am truly sad that high school is ending I can’t wait to be doing something different. Everything about high school always seemed so highly structured and safe while post secondary seems a lot more independent and risky. I’m supposed to be choosing my classes for next year tomorow and I’m super stoked. Now I just have to get through a math final, history final, and English provincial which is relatively good considering half my friends have a gazillion ( or so they say ). Anyway I should get back to studying, I’ll blog again when I can!:)
-Puja
PS: sorry if there are any gramatical errors i’m typing this from my itouch and the auto correcter is kinda wack

Recently I was reading a blog entry about a Fijian saying that all their blog titles are going to be of songs or something of that sort. I think that’s super cool!!!….probably because I tend to do that as well and coincidently the heart of life is one of my favourite John Mayer songs and it’s the title of my blog today =P.
Anyway, today was my turn to present the “picture is worth 1000 words” assignment. Usually I’m pretty okay at getting up and speaking without needing a paper to look off of but not this time. Everything I wrote on that piece of paper was what I wanted to say and I didn’t want to change or forget to say even one word because I meant the whole thing. After my presentation, during my next block I couldn’t help but reflect on Mongolia and the road getting there. I miss it so much; I miss not knowing what to expect next and an adventure around every corner. Then it occurred to me that I can still have adventures, for example on Sunday Nicole and I went to explore the old fishermen village I think it was called Finn Slough? Thinking about who originally lived there and all the history that comes with it was something that I found so interesting because I kind of have this thing for exploring the unknown which then furthers my knowledge which is good and all but I really should be fighting my war against math so I can explore and further my knowledge and all that fun stuff in the summer instead of summer school =D. So I guess what I’m trying to say is that even though I’m not in Mongolia anymore I can still have all the adventures I want and learn something new every day. As for missing Mongolia…I can’t really do anything about that except give it time and think of all the good it taught me. So as I was heading to global today I noticed a younger girl had dropped a bunch of her stuff in the hall and around her were a bunch of boys my age just standing there and laughing. After giving them a death glare I helped the girl pick up some of her stuff. During global Matheny was saying something about us being leaders and I started thinking about that a little. When I was walking towards my bus stop I noticed a girl who looked like she was in the eighth grade waiting for the same bus as me. The only difference was that I had an umbrella and she didn’t even have a hoodie. So I offered to let her stand under my umbrella and it also occurred to me that I’m truly not as shy as I used to be!! So all of this lead me to the question, what does it mean to be a global citizen? I read on one humanitarian website that a global citizen is anyone who works to make the world a better place through helping the unfortunate. I slightly disagree with that. I think a global citizen should be anyone who works to make the world a better place through helping anyone and someone who adds onto their understanding of things rather than only seeing things through one perspective. Am I a global citizen? Probably not, but I’m getting there.
Oh jeeze I never stay on topic with all my blogs ><, oh well that’s just me I guess.
Until next time,
-Puja/Puha
=))

So I’ll admit it, I do seem to get extremely sentimental and full of inspiration as well as love whenever I listen to Coldplay. I’m currently listening to life in technicolor II and it put me in the mood to blog =). So in my last entry I mentioned something about math being my kryptonite and the only last thing I need to get through to graduate and a few minutes ago I remembered something that happened on the worksite in Mongolia, bear with me this all significant in one way or another. Since the ground we were digging on was often half frozen, at times we needed to pickaxe the area to soften up the dirt. Usually when this occurred we would get either Bentley or Graham to pickaxe the area for the group of us who were digging at that particular moment. As I was digging one day I came across an irritating icy patch of dirt. My first instinct was to call Bento or Graham to do it for me when suddenly I thought, why don’t I just do it? So I got Steven to show me how to use the pickaxe (I’m pretty sure it was Steven ) and I got right to it. You want to know the craziest little thing I discovered from pick axing that day? I loved using the pickaxe! Anytime a digger came across an icy patch after that I would try and be the first one there to help. That little adventure of pick axing also got me thinking about something on a much larger scale. If I want something done, instead of waiting around for someone to do it all for me, why not just go out and get it done myself? It’s okay to receive a little help (I didn’t pick up that pick axe myself and know what to do with it), no I got a little help until I was for certain I could do it. Now to relate this back to math! For the longest time I thought math was an annoying little problem that would just go away on its own if I ignored it for long enough, silly I know but that’s what I did. I realize now that like any other fear in life, I just have to face it head on. It has become extremely clear that nobody is going to pass math for me except for me. I’ve put my silly pride aside and am now asking for help so I can succeed. I remember Alex saying “you can give a man a fish and feed him for a day, or you can teach him how to fish and feed him for the rest of his life”. That quote has never meant so much to me as it does in this very moment.  I’ve always felt like the person receiving the fish and it’s time to change that. It’s time to give up sleeping in on spares to get help, studying a bit during spares to keep it all fresh, asking for help during class rather than going home and blowing it off. These all seem like big sacrifices, small to some but nonetheless the outcome will be worth it. Math, you’re going down and are no longer going to hold me back from anything.
-Puja B
PS: I just wrote a whole blog entry about math….I don’t think anything gets dorkier than this.

I just wanted to say WOW. The global website has officially changed 2 times in the time that I have been blogging on it. A huge thanks to Tony, it truly looks amazing! So week 1 of not having class for global has gone by and we have another 1 to go =( Even though I still see most of my Mongols around I don’t get to really see the IB Mongols as often, keep going you guys you’re almost done! (by the way, Miss Nicole So you must stop freaking out, you are doing an amazing job and I’m so proud of you =) !. So seeing the Fijians doing their fundraising is really cool and I’m super stoked for them. On that note, its cool that you guys are so motivated to break ours and every other GP classes fundraising records but please don’t loose sight of what you’re really raising money for and let competition cloud your judgment because that’s not what its about =). Anyway, school is winding down, I’m graduating and still trying to fight against math, which is evidently my kryptonite.   Anyway just had the random outburst of wanting to blog but I gotta go cheer on the nucks!!! Until next time,

-Puja B

(Ps I’m secretly a Detroit Red Wings fan….. )

Sitting in on the 2011 meeting today after school was blah.  I still can’t believe that I was once in the same stage as the 2011 kids…that seems like a whole life time ago and just yesterday all at the same time.  Weird I know.  I don’t think the 2011 kids have yet to grasp just how huge this program is but then again I don’t think I did either until we started the endless but awesome fundraising.  I wish I could explain to the new GP kids just how much hard work, fun, self-worth, friendships, and love comes from being in this program but I think it’s something that they just have to figure out for themselves.  It was tough to sit in Matheny’s room after school today knowing that the newbie’s will find out their country soon and then start their blogging….which means us Mongols stop blogging?  Yeah, I’m kinda jealous I’m not going to lie I wish I could do this all again but it’s to move on forward.

As for me lately, I’m still living off the awesome feeling of McCallum’s school.  I was seriously considering transferring to Tamanawis….just kidding I love RHS too much =).  Other than that things have been good, however not taking my education seriously until a few weeks ago is really coming back to bite me in the…well you know.  Figuring out what my next 10 years are going to be like is really starting to get me thinking.  There’s so much I want to do…go to college, go to UBC eventually, backpack around Europe, re-connect with my Indian roots, make my brother proud, teach internationally, start a family, own a 1969 Shelby GT500 Mustang, the list goes on and on.  The thought that my time might get cut short and I won’t get to do a lot of those things has crossed my mind a lot to be honest.  But I sincerely believe that some things are just way out of our control and so I leave you all with this line from one of my favourite Incubus songs that sums up all that I’m feeling; “Whatever tomorrow brings, I’ll be there, with open arms and open eyes”.

-PB

I’m the kind of person that ever so often stumbles upon a song that I feel totally represents my life at the moment. Right now my song would have to be say by John Mayer and my favourite lines are;

Have no fear for giving in
Have no fear for giving over
You’d better know that in the end
Its better to say too much
Then never say what you need to say again

Even if your hands are shaking
And your faith is broken
Even as the eyes are closing
Do it with a heart wide open

Say what you need to say.

Just a little thing I thought I’d share about the song thing(=. So there have been a lot of changes since I’ve been back in Mongolia, since we’ve all been back. I think I’ve gone over the obvious ones but there’s one I left out because it didn’t occur to me until now. A couple of days ago I had a friend come up to me telling me there was something different about me, 2 days ago another friend told me I was smiling more, and yesterday my mom said I looked so much happier. And it just occurred to me, sometime earlier today when I was listening to the John Mayer song actually. The thing is I am so much happier, I just wasn’t aware that people were noticing :S. Please don’t take my words the wrong way though, I’m not trying to brag about how “happy” or “awesome” my life is, I’m just surprised that I could ever feel the way I do now ever again. I think it all goes back to the emotional sharing circle we had back in Mongolia after the closing ceremonies. Telling everyone about how that work week healed so much of the mess in my heart after my older brother’s death turned out to be a powerful moment for me because whatever anger or guilt that I was holding onto had completely left me and I’m thinking that’s why I feel so happy now. I don’t feel weighed down by all that anymore and I cannot even describe how great that feels. People keep asking me what’s next for me and so because of that I’ve been doing some serious thinking about that question. I know not for certain the exact field I want to go into but I do know this; I want to generate something positive from losing my brother because if I could just help one person believe or give them some hope that life can go on even after a traumatic experience that would just make my life. My family set up an auto scholarship in my brother’s name a couple of months after his passing at McNair where he graduated from in 2007. Auto because he was in the auto apprenticeship program and cars were his biggest passion. As much as is it pains me to do, at the same time I look forward to getting up on that stage at the McNair valedictory ceremony in June and presenting the scholarship for the second time now. This is because I know that whoever gets this honour had to be extremely special because my brother’s auto teacher picks the recipient and he was also one of Inder’s (my brother) biggest supporters. I saw my brother in the guy who received the scholarship last year and I look forward to seeing that same passion for auto in this year’s recipient. So that’s kind of what I want to do with my life I guess…honour my brothers memory, spread his wise advice, share with people every life lesson he taught me in his short but well lived 18 years here. He was a really special guy and I want to share that with the world.
Oh jeeze look at where I went with this blog…I can never seem to stay focused on talking about one thing. Oh well, it’s better to say too much then never say what you need to say again right?

-Puja

I walk down the street towards my bus stop. My new phone is about to fall out of my back pocket of my new designer jeans. It doesn’t occur to me how much money my dad spent on that incredible new phone or how hard my mom worked so I could have those designer jeans. I carelessly clutch onto my new 16GB iPod touch not really caring if it falls because my logic tells me daddy’ll just buy me a new one if this one breaks. I get to my stop, pull out my wallet and all my cash is exposed to everyone standing there as if this is what I intended to happen and it was. I pull out my bus ticket and get onto the bus without even saying hello to the bus driver. This is the Puja Bali who existed this time last year. Fast forward to the present day and time. Today while walking towards my bus stop my phone was carefully placed in my bag because it occurred to me how much money my dad spent on it and when I get home my jeans will be hanging neatly in my closet because I understand how hard my mom worked for them. My iPod touch is in a case because I realize it was expensive and my logic was heavily flawed back then. I do not show off my cash as I pull out my bus ticket, I say hello to the person standing next to me, I say hello to the bus driver and thank her when I get off. This is the Puja Bali that exists now. I was a spoiled, lost,
and materialistic first world teenager. Who am I now? An un-spoiled, found, and recovering materialistic first world teenager who’s been to the third world and has had sense knocked back into me. Grade elevens, I would do anything to re-have the experience you will soon be having. So if you’re unsure about trying out for Global Perspectives, don’t be. This is a once in a lifetime thing so just go for it. I did and like I said, I’d do it all again if I could. Best of luck to you all.

-Puja

I’m not going to lie, that fusion song has really gotten to me and I’ve listened to it over 5 times today! It reminds me so much of that fun cultural night we had in Mongolia. Speaking of Mongolia…how many more days am I going to feel this empty and withdrawn feeling now that I’m back home? Don’t get me wrong I am thrilled to be with my family and friends back home again but it just feels like there’s something missing. So I kinda want to talk about what made Mongolia so much better than i thought it would be for me. Okay so I wasn’t sure if all the new friendships I made in Mongolia with my fellow Mongols would last but I was proved wrong yet again. For example, this past week I’ve seen Nicole, bobo, or soda in the hallways and I instantly flash a stupid huge grin and hug them. This time last year I didn’t even know 1, not even 2 things about them. I hear Puha from down the hall and its rams, someone who I will openly admit I used to be a little scared of =P. And who knew Alex was so hilarious and Jasmar could take so much chocolate fondue? I know this blog may seem a little weird, just me talking about other people but it ties into what I feel. What I mean to convey through all of this is that you’ll never know just how amazing people are unless you give them a chance or instead of waiting for them to go up to and start talking to you, you go up to them and start talking. I know I sound like a broken record and probably don’t make a whole lot of sense right now but I make sense to me and I know the Mongols get me . Future global kids this is my advice to you, let people in, don’t make a judgement on somebody you barely know based on who their friends are, go up to someone you don’t know and just talk to them. I wish I could put down in words the way I’m feeling but I don’t know, it comes out either wrong or sounding generic. I remember one dinner in Erdenet, Matheny asked us what question we would ask a student who wanted to do global perspectives. I remember I said I would ask “do you take your education seriously”. I would have asked that because for a long time I didn’t take my own education seriously but I change my question. Education is important and its going to get you where you want to go but I think what I would ask now is; “are you willing to let your guard down and welcome 30 strangers into your life”?.
PS: I forgot to add Geoff the wacky co-photographer in my huge thanks thing in my last blog entry! Sorry buddy, you’re special as well!…and you owe me gum.
-Puja Bey